The Beginning of Endings

Zachary swimToday my heart is sad. Last night was Parents’ Night at the pool and the last time Z will swim in the Aquatic Center pool as a high school swimmer.  Oh how the saying fits… “where has the time gone?”

As I have mentioned, it has been a busy few months.  Between basketball and swimming, life just is whizzing by.  That is good because I haven’t been able to think about it all coming to an end.  This week we traveled 1.5 hours one way on Monday to watch JV play a basketball game.  Then on Tuesday I was at the pool getting all of the boys to write a handwritten thank you note to their parents.  I really believe that a handwritten note is so powerful and a lost art.  So we decided that the best thing we could do for parents was to have them write a note and give it to them.  For me that is more powerful than candy or flowers.

I had put together a young boy and current photo of the three seniors.  Z’s photo is above. Tonight we had these photos along with the coaches on the big screen while we did the athlete and student introductions.  Turned out cute. So glad I know enough on Photoshop Elements to complete this project.

Last night I got to the pool early to start organizing parents’ night and found out that our team was hosting the dual instead of the other team.  That means we were responsible for 16 timers.  Normally I am the one who is head timer and responsible for making sure we have enough timers for the meet.  I do this ahead of time, so scramble I did.  Kim and I were able to get the cards and suckers together and ready for the intros, and I was able to get the timers all situated.  We have great parents who are will to help when asked.

All this time I refused to think of what my heart was saying.  I was busy, so I was fine.

The coach had Z pick what he wanted to swim.  As a sprinter he loves the 50 and 100 free, but he decided to do the Individual Medley and the 100 Backstroke.  Fun to see him in different events.

One parent asked me if I was sad and I responded, “I am not thinking about it.” Which was true.  The swim meet went well. Z did well and the team won.  I was able to get the timing stuff put away and head out to the high school gym.  JV had a basketball game.

JV Feb 2014Big M had left the meet early to catch JV’s game.  I was lucky to see the second half of the game.  I am so glad I did.  JV has had a tough season.  Teammate injuries have caused the team to be split up for practices.  Basketball is a game of flow, and his team does not have it, but tonight he was determined and did very well.  The team won, JV was happy.

All I can say is I love watching my kids play and swim.

Came home, had a late supper and instead of the Olympics, we caught the Duke vs. UNC basketball game. We are Duke fans in this house.

Finally past 10:30 I lay my head on the pillow, and that is when it hit me, and I couldn’t fall asleep.  This is the first big ending.  My boy is finishing his high school swim career.   He does have two meets left–the regional and state meets, but not in this pool.  My life has revolved around swimming and basketball for years now.  Life is changing and this is only the start.  Z is turning 18 next month, ending his childhood.  He will be graduating in a couple of months.  Too many ending, and I have always hated endings.

Big M reminds me that endings mean beginnings.  True..Z will be going off to college.  He has so many adventures awaiting him.  I still have 3 years of homeschooling left and 3 years of basketball.  Next year I can completely focus on JV and not have to have my heart and mind in two places…well sort of.  It is all good.

But today my heart is sad.  I don’t want this stage of life to end.  I am so grateful that I am sad. It means we have enjoyed this stage. It means that we have participated in something great that we don’t want to end.  I wouldn’t give up these feelings for the world.  I am so grateful to have been able to watch Z grow in his life and swimming had a lot to do with his physical, as well as mental growth.

So today I will let myself be a little sad and tomorrow…I will let tomorrow come and embrace all of the endings, being mindful of the wonderful memories and the new beginnings because….Life is good, it is all good.

4 thoughts on “The Beginning of Endings

  1. Well said!!! Remember those feelings like it was yesterday. I feel your sadness and have just dried a few tears. Life is good, it is all good!!

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